Four years ago, I cringed when people asked me what I was thankful for that year. I had no answer, no thankfulness in my heart. Thanksgiving 2013 marked one year since we decided to try to have a baby. Thanksgiving 2013 also marked my third positive pregnancy test in that year. I wasn’t thankful to be pregnant with a baby I assumed I’d never meet. There were some other very painful things going on in my life that year that I won’t get in to, but let me tell you: sometimes thankfulness is really hard. You could thank God for His generous provision but even that hurts because it reminds you of what you feel like He didn’t give you this year.
May I just encourage you in one way? Maybe you don’t look around and feel thankful for your current circumstances. But future you might feel differently. If I could tell the 2013 version of me anything about thankfulness it would be this: God is about to do a great work in you. Sometimes rock bottom is where you need to be to see His glory and allow Him to do good things in your life. No, circumstances won’t suddenly turn around and be great, but He will turn your anger to joy, doubt to hope, and love of worldly things into love for Him. That’s something to be thankful for.
Let us thank Him for what He is about to do. Thank Him for how He turns our brokenness into a grace filled life. Thank Him for how He turns our suffering into His glory and our good. You can rest knowing He will show up for you.
In case you don’t know the dates and math of it all, that thanksgiving in 2013 I was pregnant with my sweet girl. Every year since, I am overwhelmed by thankfulness. Not just because she is here, but because of all that came with her. Jesus changed me in this season of loss and for that I am thankful.
Peace & Joy 